D is for Disappointment

I once took a seminar where I learned that there are only three causes of any upset. 1) An unfulfilled expectation. 2) A thwarted intention. 3) An undelivered communication.  In other words: You didn't get what you wanted. You didn't do what you wanted. You didn't say what you wanted.

My latest disappointment--a true upset--was all three of these.  I would like to lay the blame at the feet of the person who I could say disappointed me.  However, I need to own my share in the disappointment.  I didn't have something happen that I wanted to happen. However, at some point I needed to communicate something to this person that I didn't.  I needed to stand up for myself and stand up for how I deserve to be treated. I didn't. My intentions were thwarted because I had intended to practice speaking up and letting my needs be known with this person, but when the moment of truth arrived, I kept silent. I chose not rocking the boat over my needs.

I was also disappointed in myself because I didn't follow through what I wanted to do. However, I have regrouped, forgiven myself, and will try again. We are none of us perfect and sometimes we will not do what we intended. Sometimes we will take the path of least resistance and perhaps not stick up for ourselves. But we can dust off and try again. We can become stronger. We can say to ourselves: "I give myself permission to attempt this until I get it right."