W is for Wanting

Wanting. We all want things in life. A better job, new car, bigger house, to lose weight...the list of things people could possibly want is endless.  I myself want things.  But foremost of these has been a life partner (significant other, boyfriend). 

The thing is, I have been concentrating so much and so hard on the wanting, that I have never allowed myself (until recently) to think about the GETTING.  Much of not allowing myself to think about the getting was self-preservation. What if I let myself think about it happening and I got disappointed?  Then my friend helped me realize that's exactly why I wasn't getting. I had stopped anything before it could even become a fully-formed thought. As she put it "You're hell and damnationing it before it even gets off the ground."  Truer words were never said. So, for the past two weeks I have been allowing myself to move from just thinking about wanting to actually getting.  It's a very strange and new feeling for me. To be hopeful is not something I'm used to doing.  One of the things I've done is I've created a dream board and put up images, words, and phrases of the things I want to do, be, or have. And lo and behold, within DAYS some of the things started manifesting in my life. 

As mentioned in my "V is for Victory" post, I haven't quite conquered all the bad habits of putting the kibosh on things before they can even get started, but baby steps are the way I'm dealing with it. It took me 40 years to build up these bad habits, so it'll take a bit of time to replace them with better habits.